DeBricazar wrote:
10:02:38 a.m.: Intercepted delivery man
10:02:39 a.m.: Tore box out of said delivery man's hands
10:02:41 a.m.: Charged into house, breaking screen door in process
10:03:01 a.m.: Tore open Tales of Wonder box, got cardboard splinter
10:03:03 a.m.: Cursed loudly about cardboard splinter (seriously, who gets those?)
10:03:27 a.m.: Lifted book out of box, heard angels sing
10:03:59 a.m.: Felt wrenching in back from strain
10:04:03 a.m.: Puzzlement turns to extreme agony
10:04:07 a.m.: Blood-curdling scream: "WHY DID THEY MAKE THIS SO HEAVY?!?"
10:04:09 a.m.: Drops book
10:04:10 a.m.: Book lands on right foot, shattering it
10:04:12 a.m.: More obscenities
10:04:59 a.m.: Quick call to neighbor for lift to hospital
10:40:01 a.m.: Neighbor arrives
10:40:04 a.m.: Hurl obscenities at neighbor for tardiness
10:40:32 a.m.: Neighbor attempts to shiv me
10:40:34 a.m.: Use book for protection
10:50:20 a.m.: Patch things up with neighbor, get lift to hospital
Next three days: Lay in hospital bed, wishing for good reading material
Next day: Send shived book back to TOW for replacement
One week later, 10:02:38 a.m.: Waits in bushes to intercept delivery man
Only Thor fans who are worthy can lift the mighty Omnibus! Tongue